Depression: On a Scale from Anna Kendricks to Staying in Bed for Days

Posted on by under Life

I have a new way to measure depression.

This is in no way meant to denigrate Anna Kendricks. Her funny and insightful presence on Twitter is worth the price of admission.

That being said, I’ve learned that the movies Pitch Perfect are a good way to gauge my current level of depression.

I’m currently watching Pitch Perfect II.

Last weekend, I tricked Randy into watching Pitch Perfect. I did this by starting the movie while he was getting a beer. I just wanted to hear some singing and not think about much of anything.

Not going to lie, I didn’t feel any less empty inside when the last note was sung. Randy was quiet through most of the movie. Fat Amy made him laugh a few times. Then he claimed it was the worst movie he has ever seen. I don’t really think that is true. He watched a movie once about a tire that rolled around by itself and blew shit up. Pitch Perfect is at least better than that.

I didn’t think, after watching the first one that I would ever move on to the next movie. But between juggling some big worries and not getting the painting done, I broke down, crawled into bed, waited for Randy to start snoring, and dialed up the second movie.

Randy’s snores are harmonizing nicely with the Bardon Bellas. 

Depression is rude as fuck.

Did it give me any warning? Did it call ahead and say “Hey, would now be a good time to not care about anything and lose all your ability to focus?” No. No it did not.

And now it’s here.

Let’s just hope next week evens out a bit.

I really hope I don’t get to Pitch Perfect III. That’s some dark territory right there.

I’ve been trying to focus more on stories of grace, hope, love and not so much on the tire fire that is my country. I mean, I haven’t been trying real hard. But damn, there is so much coming at us every day, I find it difficult to not get bogged down.

Speaking of singing, I did have a bright spot last week.

I got to hear Mountain girl sing The Madison’s new song, Dove. I’m sharing this with you because I think we need as much beauty as we can get.

How about you? Have any stories that are hopeful or kind or funny? Hit me. I could use them.

Seriously, I can’t watch another movie about acapella and come back out on the other side in one piece.

 

22 Thoughts.

  1. No fucking way is any Pitch Perfect better than Rubber!
    Also…Randy watching that movie may have been my fault. I think I vaguely remember recommending it to you when you were in the hunt for (ahem) quality B movies.
    When you aren’t in the grip of that bitch depression, you may find this funny.

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  2. Well, let’s see… The Sinclair-Tribune merger went down in flames and is now the you-behaved-like-dicks-so-give-us-a-billion-dollars Tribune-Sinclair lawsuit.
    I have a 10gb/mo data cap that we’ve already used more than 8gb of, so I don’t have any good video links for you, but the Bloggess has been writing about her TMS treatments, and that seems like a good sort of read if you’re wrestling with depression.
    I used to have issues with depression (more of a bi-polar thing for me, really, months of slogging through the sludge, then WHEEEE!!!!) but I haven’t had those issues since my stroke, for some reason, despite some depressing situations I lived through since then. I still would not recommend a stroke, or really, any form of brain damage that I’m aware of as a remedy for depression.
    It always helped me to remember that depression is a chemical thing, not so much a mood thing, although an out of control mood can start the chemicals if I wasn’t lucky or “careful”, whatever the fuck that means.
    Then there’s this from Neko Case’s album-before-the-latest-one, on the subject of depression:
    –
    “Night Still Comes”

    My brain makes drugs to keep me slow,
    A hilarious joke for some dead pharaoh.
    But now, not even the masons know
    What drug will keep night from coming.

    There are so many tools that are made for my hands.
    But the tide smashes all my best-laid plans to sand.
    And there’s always someone to say it’s easy for me,
    But I revenge myself all over myself.
    There’s nothing you can say to me.
    You never held it at the right angle,
    You never held it at the right angle,
    Catch a, catch a, catch a, catch a falling star,
    But wash your hands of it
    Catch a, catch a, catch a, catch a falling star
    Because you can’t hold it.
    –
    She wrote that album after dealing with some depression herself, and now that I think of it, I highly recommend the NPR Tiny Desk Concert she did one Halloween where she played that song (and two others) in a Gorrilla suit, with zombie Kelly Hogan backing her up (and I think Eric Bachmann and a drummer, both in costume). The other two songs are “Calling Cards” which is sweet and sad, and “Local Girl” which she describes in the video as “stabby”.
    I hope you are feeling better soon, because I am well aware that depression sucks donkey balls.

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  3. You’ve been through a lot of stress lately, so no wonder–it’s exhausting and wearing. I hope you start feeling lighter soon. Your friend has an amazing voice by the way!

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  4. Just from your description I want to see that movie about the tire that rolled around and blew shit up, even though reading the Wikipedia description it sounds like someone’s fucked-up filmmaking class project that got inexplicably turned into a feature film.
    And I want to watch Pitch Perfect which I’m sure has got to be better.
    Also thank you for sharing The Madison’s new song because it really is lovely.

    Reply

  5. I feel ya, lady. Thx for sharing that beautiful music. Music saves me every day.
    So, happy news…got rid of cable, lost 20 lbs and started eating dinner at the table instead in front of the boob tube and actually enjoy it.
    Best podcast ever, In the Dark S2, prompted actions to possibly right a horrendous miscarriage of justice. True, shoe leather journalism at its finest. This show will make you angry and optimistic and impressed all at the same time.
    P.S. Randy’s right about Pitch Perfect.

    Reply

  6. I’m with you. So much happening in life gets overwhelming. Last night I was in bed before 8, and I was in bed past 8 this morning. Never a good sign.

    Kinda funny, I got soaked walking home from lunch because I’m too stubborn to stop in a convenience store and grab a cheap poncho or umbrella… Not funny-haha, more like funny-stupid. Maybe a metaphor for life?

    Reply

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