Whack For My Stereo

Posted on by under Humor

I wrote a blog post, a long time ago, about misheard lyrics. I wrote it when I realized the beginning of The Flamingos I Only Have Eyes For You was saying “My love must be a kind of blind love” and not “My love must be a kite of my love.”

This post isn’t about misheard lyrics, this is about lyrics that I sing that I know are wrong.

For instance, I love Bruce Springsteen. I have loved Bruce Springsteen since high school. I can’t think of too many Bruce Springsteen songs I don’t like. If I’m flipping through radio stations in the car, I will always stop on a Springsteen song. I don’t need to check to see if there is something better on another station on my presets. He’s always going to be in my top five.

Although, I will say, Bruce isn’t always goddamn easy to understand.

I love the song Down Bound Train. There is a lyric I am pretty sure I sing wrong. I don’t think the lyric is “Hunting down a cross eyed Horton in the rain.”

I looked up the line more than once, and would read the lyric and think, “oh yeah, that makes more sense”. But then I hear the song, and all I can hear is “Hunting down a cross eyed Horton in the rain”. I never remember the right lyrics.

I have another song like that. I would look it up, but really, I’ve gone this many years without knowing too much about this song. I’m good.

It’s a Metallica song. I think. I am like 99.9999% sure it’s a Metallica song.

I’m not a Metallica fan, but do like that one song where he’s a pirate or something.

Driving to work in the morning is often bumper to bumper and very slow. I sometimes call Randy because I’m bored and we talk about whatever I’m listening to on the radio. I love these talks. We started listening to a local college station and I love it. Well, half the time, I don’t care for what they play, but the other half is fucking awesome. I’ll be sitting in traffic and call Randy to tell him that I’m listening to Teenage Werewolf by The Cramps. Then, we’ll talk about music and I won’t be so stressed sitting in traffic. Seriously, though, this station is the shit. I hear Ramones songs that aren’t I Want To Be Sedated or maybe Rock N Roll High School. One morning, I heard A Boy Named Sue by Johnny Cash followed by The Clash’s Bank Robber followed by Avant Gardener by Courtney Barnett. It felt like a little playlist from heaven made just for me.

I called Randy this morning when I heard the Metallica song. Which wasn’t playing on my college station. They must have been playing some wussy ballad song they seem so fond of.

Me: Hey, I’m listening to that Metallica song I like.

Randy: You hate Metallica.

Me: Yeah, but not this song. It’s that “whack for my stereo” song.

Randy: They don’t have a whack for my stereo song.

Me: Yeah, you know the one. They say something like A Ray Ra Ma Do Ra Ma Da.

Randy: Did you have a stroke?

Me: The whiskey in the jarro song. The one about Molly and sleeping and whacking the stereo.

Randy:…

Me: Yeah, he says “whack for my stereo, whack for my stereo…whiskey in the jarro”.

Randy: That’s not what he’s saying.

Me: I know. I have no idea what he’s saying. That’s just how I sing it.

In my defense, it’s not my fault I do this. I come from women who make up song words. It’s in my blood. What are you gonna do?

When I was around 16, my mother told me that she liked the Eric Clapton song Way Down South. I told her that Eric Clapton didn’t have a song called Way Down South.

So she sang it to me. She was singing way down south to the tune of Lay Down Sally. I told her what the lyrics were really saying and she shrugged. She said “I don’t care. I like my words better”.

So, have you “improved” any songs over the years?

P.S. I have an original, just published, piece on the wonderful Midlife Boulevard, titled Beyond Self Acceptance.

 

94 Thoughts.

  2. I come from a very short line of lyric changers. It always makes my kids laugh when I will change the lyrics of the song on the radio to something I want them to do when we get home. It doesn’t make them do it, but they laugh which is fun.
    I have plenty of songs I sing the wrong lyrics to, but can only think of Swifty’s Starbucks Lovers one off hand. I sing the wrong lyrics louder so my daughter will roll her eyes at me which is fun and makes me laugh.
    Ps: I love that Metallica song too.

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  3. YEESSS! I can look up a lyric to clarify and then, immediately forget the correct lyric in favor of the one i’ve heard in my head. My friend’s daughter always thought that Bad Moon Rising said “there’s a bathroom on the right.” (there’s a bad moon on the rise)

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  4. Once again, you crack me up. I’ve misheard lots of lyrics over the years, but of course can’t recall any at this particular moment. I also mishear my husband a lot, too (and he returns the favor).

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  6. I had a friend recently singing ‘Old McDonald had a FUN’ which is disturbing on so many levels. First of all, it’s a classic, everybody knows McDonald had a farm, secondly it makes no sense grammatically speaking, and thirdly it leaves you wandering what type of fun McDonald was having and why. You can’t leave people hanging like that. *shaking my head*

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  7. I LOVE THIS!!!!!!
    I don’t think there is a single song out there I haven’t fixed! Remember ‘Pheasants in the Rain?’ 🙂
    Everyday I have a song in my head on loop. Sometimes I’m lucky and it’s one I like. Sometimes it’s just a single line on a melody and sometimes it’s a melody and I just throw in “I love my library shoes” to fill in the void.
    (I just read ‘Pete the Cat loves his White Shoes’ …ya know. Singing happy cat in my head for a whole month!)
    My granddaughter and I sing, “It’s a beautiful day”…to start, and since everything rhymes with ‘day’ we can be on a roll for hours!
    Great thing about 4 year olds, melody is as you make it. So is harmony. So is humming when you give up on opening your face and coordinating your lips with your tongue with your brain.
    I decided a LOOONNGGG time ago that the music is what keeps us in touch with spirituality. The words are just enhancers and have the power to move me to tears if I’m so inclined to leave that song playing.
    This time of year, any lilt tips me over that edge, so I stick with stuff like Seven Mary 3, Tech 9 and other super heavy hard metal rock til January. And, anything off of Bob and Tom is OK, too, like “I Take a Look at my Enormous Penis” and “It’s a Great Day to Kick Somebody’s Ass.” ( ♪♪ ♪♪ and everything is going my way ♪♪ ♪♪ )
    🙂
    My husband gave up on correcting my lyrical adaptations, but I will ask him sometimes what the song is really saying because I can’t make the syllables flow, but other than that, he’s happy I’m not concentrating on what he’s saying that I might have to throw back at him later…
    Thanks for a fun morning read!! Now go listen to the ‘Penis’ song and tell me if that didn’t make you smile!!

    Reply

    • HAHAH..I LOVE THIS.

      And I’ve heard the penis song..and the kick somebody’s ass song. They are awesome. And yes..also stuck there now.

      I always have music playing in my head. Always. I just have very little control over what plays.

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      • Yup…very little control…That’s when I use the ‘Robin Hood’ theme to shut everybody up and let my brain plateau for a while.
        Sorry/Glad to make your Brain Playlist focus on penis music…
        🙂

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  9. I believe I have “improved” every single Stevie Nicks song that has ever existed. (And I adore her and Fleetwood Mac, too!) Between Stevie and Bruce, there’s a whole lotta “Huh???” going on! 😀
    The best misquoted lyric I have ever read about was the lyrics to this old Cuban hit, called, “Guantanamera”. Someone thought they were saying “One Ton Tomato, I got a one ton tomato”! HAHAHA!!! So, now, whenever it comes on an oldies station (yeah, I listen to those sometimes) I deliberately sing “One Ton Tomato”! Far, far better lyrics!

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  12. Seriously spitting into my coffee right now. “Did you have a stroke?” I get it! I’m constantly reinventing the lyrics and improving songs. And yes to Bruce! My favourite video of all time is the one of him and Courtney Cox (pre cougarland) My two are due home from college any day and I look forward to entertaining them with my imaginative song creations. I’ve been without an audience for far too long. Off to share this beaut of a post.

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  14. Until I was about 20 years old, I thought the Van Halen song “Panama” was called “Cannonball.” ‘Til this day, I can be heard rockin’ out singing “Cannonball…….cannonba…allll…….” I refuse to sing the correct lyrics and it drives my friends crazy (not that we sit around listening to Van Halen, mind you…..that would be weird. Would it?).

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  15. Personalized lyrics: one of my favourite mood-lifters! The last time I checked out KissThisGuy.com I laughed for ages. My personal challenge was always Toto’s “Africa”.

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  16. Anything by the Cocteau Twins is utterly unintelligible and utterly beautiful so take your pick. Not to mention that my favorite Bruce song is Streets of Philadelphia which is actually fully intelligible so there you have it. Oh, and since you brought it up, you should check out the Art Garfunkel version of ‘I only have eyes for you’, it is heart-squeezingly good

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  17. Oh but I forgot my almost all time favorite: singing ‘I hear you talking, but you can’t convince’ to my kids regularly, to the tune of ‘I hear you knocking, but you can’t come in’ (Dave Edmunds 1970 classic!) They were not as big of fans. And of course when they were young I tried to convince them that Gwen was singing ‘that’s my shoe’ instead of ‘that’s my shit’. Of course, now that ship has sailed and we all swear freely. So liberating

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  19. Metallica IS hard to understand and they don’t include the lyrics in their CD’s! (Does anyone buy CD’s any more???) Thanks to the kids we now refer to a couple of songs by their interpretations…
    “Don’t cry tomato, baby!” Translation: don’t cry to me now, baby.
    “Dungeons and beans…” Translation: don’t tread on me.

    There are so many more, but I’m “working” right now and can’t concentrate on important things like this blog! 🙂

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  21. Just last night I was singing that Van Halen song “Panama”. My husband’s favorite band, mind you. I sing it, “Animal… Animal…” Always have, always will. Drives him nuts.

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    • Randy does the same thing with Night Ranger. Instead of “Don’t tell me you love me” he sings “Just tell me you love me”. I tell him..YOU ARE CHANGING THE WHOLE MEANING…but he won’t stop.

      It’s not even a good song.

      Reply

  22. I went to grade school with a girl named Anna Marie. In the Creedence Clearwater song “Out My Back Door” everyone at school said they were singing, “Ann Marie’s an elephant out playing in the sand.” How awful, eh? Today Anna Marie is stunningly beautiful!

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  23. Now I really want to know which Metallica song it is because my husband is one of their biggest fans! He gets on me for just singing the words I do know of songs and not the whole song. Plus, he told me that Christmas songs were for listening to and not singing along with. I think he is wrong! I once read an article in high school about misheard lyrics. My favorite was Bob Dylan, “The ants are my friends, they’re blowing in the wind….”

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  24. I think I’ve had a hearing problem since early teens. I’ve mangled more lyrics than I can count. I remember my sister laughing at me for singing “Medieval Woman”( ELO), and even now I find myself asking my kids, “What’s he singing? What’s she singing?” and it always seems perfectly clear to everyone else. Just belted out Thunder Road in my car the other morning. God only knows what I was singing. Just today I listened to Barenaked Ladies sing Phil Collins’s In The Air Tonight (on AVclub) and had an “ah-ha!” moment (how can she fuck that up, you ask). You should hear me sing along to Red Hot Chili Peppers. Or maybe not. That station you listen to sounds great. I often listen to an R&B satellite station. It’s enlightening …. “ohhhhh” she says, finally getting it right after decades. Metal is another lyric disaster! (btw you mean it isn’t Secret Asian Man???)

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  25. When my son was in pre-school he came home singing Bruce Springsteen’s “Bong in the USA!” And that is they way we sing it at our house even though son is now 32 and Dad to two young sons. Can’t wait to hear the lyrics they come up with.

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  26. Laughing too hard at all these 😉 and here’s a recent one I can’t un-hear … Taylor Swift’s song Blank Space … a line goes ‘got a long list of ex-lovers’ …but I hear it as ‘gotta lotta Asian lovers’ … I’m not sure why…

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  27. You make me laugh. Out loud. Thank you.
    I make up song lyrics too, but I can’t even remember them – the songs or my lyrics.

    I read and enjoy every post, and wish there was a “like” button, since I don’t always have the time to comment, or anything to say besides “I love this.”

    Reply

    • Thank you so much! I’m just glad you’re visiting. I do have a like button at the end of my posts, what browser are you using? Maybe I have a technical issue…I’ll have to get my IT dept. to look at it. (Randy).

      Reply

  28. I don’t “improve” them so much as get a little creative! And every once in awhile I’m appalled at the words I’m singing. Not knowing the meanings of the lyrics, I still blush when I think about the many times I belted out the tune “A Pearl Necklace” in mixed company!

    I’m on my way over to check out your Midlife piece!

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  29. The hilarious thing about this blog post is that I knew it was Whisky in the jar before I even read it 🙂 Work for my Daddy-O is the line but it does sound remarkably like that, especially the Thin Lizzy version.
    The one I always get wrong is The Vapors’ Turning Japanese. I always heard ‘cyclone ranger’ when it’s ‘psyched lone ranger’

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  31. Ha! So many songs that I’ve twisted the lyrics on purpose then there are the ones that I really thought I had right, only to discover when reading the lyrics that I had it so wrong. Most recently, our grandson got a princess butterfly that lights up and sings. The song is basically unintelligible anglo-asian but at one point, it sounds like “La La La, Pizza in the night! I started singing it that way and he just cracked up! So now we see each other and start singing Pizza in the night! and laugh and grin so much. Glad to read and learn I’m not the only one and that I’m in with a great group of people who do similarly.

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  33. Hahahaha… Yes, this happens to me all the time. We also make up our own words to songs that we sing so much that we can no longer remember the actual lyrics.

    Like: (for Boston’s Amanda)

    I want to take you by the thighs and make you realize..
    Amanda.
    I want to take you by the hand, then put it where I can…
    Amanda.

    This is just one sad example of my depraved life

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  35. I never get the lyrics right when I sing along, but I’m especially bad when it comes to songs by REM. I always thought Michael Stipe was singing about “Weenie skins and river rats” when he was actually saying ” We knee-skinned and river ran.” In my defense, that line is just odd.

    Now, if I could just figure out what he’s saying when I hear “Throw your trolls out the door.”

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  36. Your lyrics are great! I never want to hear the correct lyrics or know about them because I like mine! Singers who mumble a bit are of course my favorites because my words fit so nicely and no one knows what they are saying anyways!

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  37. First of all, I don’t believe I’ve ever seen (and read) so many comments on a blog. Good for YOU!
    The ‘misheard’ lyrics that are legend in our family are a twist on Benny and the Jets. We were driving along when my youngest was about 3 and the song came on the radio. All of a sudden I started listening to the 3-year-old and poked my husband. He was singing, ‘pa pa pa panties on my head!’

    We still laugh about it today and he is 42.
    b

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  40. I know a guy who claims to have written Down Bound Train (think Chuck Berry, not Bruce) and had it stolen from him by the record company. I would have no reason to believe him if it weren’t for the fact that he actually did write The In Crowd, and did have most of the rights to it stolen from him.
    Springsteen songs are sort of famous for this “mondegreen” phenomenon. Especially Blinded By The Light.
    There is a band from Italy called PFM that I have been listening to since the fucking seventies, and I still don’t really know what they’re saying when I hear them, even after looking up their lyrics multiple times, which is sort of sad, because every time I hear the song “Out of the Roundabout” I want to sing with it a whole lot…

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    • I was listening to Down Bound Train the Nebraska sessions today and that lyric is completely understandable in that version. Already forgot it. It’s back to cross eyed horton in the rain.

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  42. Oh yes, I am a huge lyric changer and once I hear it one way, I just can’t get my head around the “correct” words.

    I can’t think of some of my best efforts on the spot, but I do know I had this conversation with my husband a few weeks ago on the way to a Def Leppard concert

    Me : Livin’ like a lover with a red IPhone….
    Husband: Um. I don’t think that’s what that says.
    Me: Yes it is
    Husband: You know this song was released in like 1987 or something?
    Me: So?
    Husband: So…..IPhone’s didn’t exist. I’m not even sure mobile phones existed AT ALL back then. In fact, I’m pretty sure they didn’t.
    Me: Shush, you’re ruining the song.

    Reply

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