I told you guys I was going to start saving the instant message conversations between me and my work friend, Priscilla, Queen of the Cubicle.
It’s a real pain in the ass to cut and paste these conversations. There has to be an easier way to do it than I am. Good thing I work in IT.
HAHAHAH. I know ONE antiquated programming language. I’m not an expert in any other IT area. I am a step or two above the users who have issues that can only be explained by head trauma, but still, not an IT expert. I’ll have to ask one of the guys for help and risk them giving me shit about not knowing how to do something. Little fuckheads.
Anyway, I digress. Here is the next volume in the PQOTC series. These conversations are in no way related to each other. Don’t try, it would probably trigger a migraine, even if you don’t get them.
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Me: Have you seen the ‘between the ferns’ videos with Zach Galifankiouszlidoe? I have no idea how to spell his name.
PQOTC: BAHAHAH. No. I think you spelled it right.
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Me: I thought yesterday was Thursday. I refuse to work two Thursdays in a row. We are renaming today to ‘Not Friday’.
PQOTC: OMG I thought the same thing yesterday.
Me: Our brains are in cahoots.
Me: Yes, I said cahoots.
PQOTC: hahahah. At least I know what that is. I mean, not the exact definition, but I understand it.
Me: I don’t know the origin either. I have no idea what a cahoot is.
PQOTC: Sounds like it could be dirty.
Me: My cahoot hurts
PQOTC: From now on, that is definitely a dirty word.
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PQOTC: I have the hiccups and they’re really loud.
PQOTC: I’m trying to eat broken tacos and I’m going to choke with my hiccups.
Me: hold your breath
PQOTC: ok. I couldn’t before because I was eating. I think they’re gone now.
PQOTC: What are hiccups?
Me: I don’t know. Air getting trapped or something?
PQOTC: I googled. They’re caused by a sudden closing of your glottis. That sounds alien. MY GLOTTIS HURTS
Me: someone stole my glottis and left me in a hotel room bathtub.
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Until next time…
If I worked with the two of you I might actually put on clothes and go to work.
That’s a lie. But you make it awfully tempting.
Oh trust me…we’re mostly miserable..but damn..we do our best to make it easier.
Glottis sounds dirty, too.
It really does!
Two cahoots. One glottis.
No wonder the taco broke.
Hahaha..she’s a taco breaker.
Too funny. Cahoots makes me think of some old pioneer woman saying it. Like “man sons be in cahoots with that Jesse James rascal”.
I’m the IT person in our extended family, which usually just means I clicked on HELP and am reading it to them over the phone…
Hahah…I never thought of cahoots that way, but I will from now on. 🙂
That should say”Mah” sons.
Stupid auto correct
I knew what you meant. 🙂
By the way…I tried to leave a comment about your story with the douche monster who wanted to share your swim lane and I still can’t. The internet hates me.
I’m so freakishly addicted to funny text convos. hahaha tacos, glottis, and cahoots. Very funny. I was grinning like an idiot whilst reading. Actually, come to think of it, I grin like an idiot all the time, like even at red lights. *realizes why she has no friends*
Don’t feel bad…I have out loud imaginary arguments at red lights. I prefer to think of us as quirky.
According to Merriam-Webster in cahoots means in partnership or league, with the origin being perhaps the French cahute, meaning cabin or hut. Why the 19th century French believed a cabin or hut was required for a league or partnership is not explained.
Now that you mention it, though, cahoots does sound like a slang word for a body part: He sank in the mud clear up to his cahoots…
Thanks Doug..but if cahoots is a body part…then I don’t think boys have one.
I just had the hiccups all day yesterday. Let me tell you, my glottis was killing me by the end of the day. I also thought that last Wednesday was Thursday. It must have been something in the air.
It’s a plot. That’s the only explanation. And sorry to hear about your glottis.
Am I the only one who thinks taco and glottis sound dirty? Especially a broken taco. Ouch.
If I shared any of the messages my g/f and I send between each other, honestly, I’d probably be committed to a secure facility. Which…now that I think about it, may not be so bad – free room and board, free hug-me jackets and free drugs. AND, no work. Hmmmmm……
It could be viewed as a spa experience….
I work with lawyers. Trust me, it IS a Spa experience in comparison.